4 Marriage Lessons from My Marriage-To My Wife

1) The Provision Rule.
A man must take personalresponsibility for his family finances even if he earn lesser than his wife or hasfinancial challenges he must take the responsibility to provide. I once shared that even if things get so badthat I lose everything I have, if the last option is to carry blocks and do laborers work, I must not delegate bill payments to my wife. There is dignity in labor.Men are designed to provide for the home and women are designed to manage the provision. You break that rule, you can lose your home for it.
 
2) Teachability Rule
You must forever remain teachable. Both parties must do this. No one, except God, knows it all. Learn to be willing to learn from your spouse. Pride has killed many homes. Was counseling a couple recently; the husband wants to divorce his wife and took her things out of his house. After much appeal to the man and correctional talks to him. The wife was asked, do you want to divorce him? She said no! And was asked to kneel and beg her husband and she started counting his error. Just go on your knees and apologize.Listen guys, I have learnt in life that it’s better to have peace than to be right. And to have peace you must learn to apologize it doesn’t matter who is right or wrong. Use theMagicalword “I Am Sorry”. Both parties must learn to use the word “I Am Sorry”. Stop waiting for who will say it first. Bury your ego to have a peaceful home.
 
3)Forgiveness Rule
The person that will hurt you most in your life journey is your spouse. It is the curse/blessing of love. But God made it easy by giving the forgiveness hormones if you choose to activate it. E.g. your parents and siblings are the only oneswho will use the most insulting words to you but you must learn to forgive still. Unforgiveness is like witchcraft it ties you down and prevents you from moving forward with your life. Learn to practice advanced forgiveness. I practice lifetime forgiveness in my marriage. Even the uncommitted offenses have been forgiven before they are committed.
 
4) Don’t Let Prophets/Pastors nor third party enter your marriage.
It was agreed from inception. “NO THIRD PARTY”. Marriages that last don’t involve third parties in solving their issues not even pastors or family nor false prophets who see stupid visions. The day I will cut off my relationship with you is the day you start seeing stupid prophecies. Learn to pray for people instead of telling them evil visions you saw. A real man solves his matter with his wife without 3rd party, and a submissive wife will agree to the issues being resolved no matter the height. Once you take it to Public Square, you have wrecked your life period. Let me add this, if you married a foolish man, it’s your fault, accept it and stop blaming the man. If you married a witch or foolish woman, it’s your fault so stop telling the world that you where foolish enough to marry a foolish person and blaming the foolish person for your foolishness. What I have learnt is that no one is perfect and all these perfect syndrome talks can’t help any home and it will affect generations unborn. So perfect your home by picking a man whose weakness you can handle and a woman whose weakness can be handled and turn the marriage to a beautiful thing.
 
Help me appreciate my wife for making my life peaceful and glorious. I have no single regret marrying my wife, Period!If things are wrong in my home, I and I alone take full responsibility, Period! These 4 rules have kept my home sweet.
Love you bae! You are a great woman. I love you and God bless you real good! 2 great nations and third one on the way. You have managed our home gloriously during scarcity and plenty.
A wonderful guy wrote an anniversary poem for me and my wife, Enjoy it;
*Happy Anniversary to You, Stephen Akintayo*
I watched from afar then moved closer
And the gaze on one side was as good as on the other.
I did spy on your inside and I was awestruck to see the values you carry!
If they knew how a rare gem you would become, an elephant from the Sahara would be killed for your christening.
If some got a glimpse of the pace you’ve set ahead, they would learn how to run from a mental Usain bolt.
And Like the maxim has it, “Beside a successful man is a woman who helped dictate the tune”.
You started like every other men, Continued like some of them did,
But kept the testimony like a few who dared the uncertainty of the future.
You got some blow from life’s menace,
Fell and fell, but you kept on rising.
The picture for the desired end wasn’t clear,
Yet you weathered the storm to make the finishing line.
It was hard at a time, you can tell,
But you hoped for the dividend in the end.
It’s been years of tasking moments,
Yet the union is going great daily.
The journey so far is worth it…
As I can see the smile on your face.
As long as you live, I wish you a marriage with incessant streaks.
Happy anniversary to you, Stephen Akintayo.
With wishes from the Adebumitis
 
 
Stephen Akintayo.
The Mentor.
 

Originally posted 2016-10-20 14:37:28.